More than a practical joke, it's a day that should be raining. Even so, the sun came out this afternoon. My chemistry teacher rocks. She put on a magic show for us since we had our last test last Friday.
I walked in the rain for almost an hour carrying flowers. Took a hot shower.
I decided a year ago to spend my life with another. Within six months after, I went back on my decision. Six months later I'm here.
I want a best friend. Those feet that dance my way. The smile that brightens my day.
An unusual occurrence, almost unfortunate in the consequential events that tumbled down the calendar.
Day after day of sitting, waiting, wishing and hoping to never be alone. Ever.
Not alone as you feel when left in the mountains, away from everyone. The alone you feel after having not been. Only felt when your soul embraces another and you expect they'd stick around.
Except I didn't.
This day hasn't been a debilitating train wreck. I've got my legs, my feet. My hands and arms still have strength. There's a thump thump in my chest that tells me I'm alive. Oh, and my hair looks great this afternoon, after that nice shower.
I'm terribly unsuccessful with respect to my personal spirituality and religious observance, at least as of this school year (which can feel like a long time spiritually). But I still believe that God is merciful, and gives to His children what they ask for, whether it's heaven or not.
I want to meet her again.
That spirit which loved me so well. The hands that sought constant care for myself. Lips speaking kindness and optimism during the darkest of days. Eyes that appreciated all that I am.
It's Spring and life is budding, growing, renewing.
Where am I?
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